A POEM BY BEN PARKER - 15/9/17

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lucid dreaming into

moments that could be

alternative reality

seeing places that i shoud be

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i made some poor decisions

the rest was out my hands

but to have that fall through my fingers

like beach sands

how couldnt i be disappointed

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we were too young

the chemistry didnt add up

some things arent meant to be 

you roll the dice and get bad luck

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fast forward present day

do we regret our decisions yet

she still remembers old nicknames

but all our conversations i seem to forget

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mental blank 

erased from my history

but now you wont walk away

instead youll make a fist for me

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what a compromise

a situation to be in

but the futures not like the past

its hard to see into

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but its hard for us to contemplate

situations we havent lived

16 then what would it be like at 32

would i still have those feelings as a 

boy of resentment towards you

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i left the door ajar for you

but this isnt an invitation

its just a chance to reevaluate

our complex situation

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childhood drama

we've been dealt the most

when it happened to you

did you realise then that you needed me

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apologised for past reactions

as the sourness drained out my environment

laid my hate to rest

gave my stress a retirement

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im glad youre still here

i couldnt have taken seeing you up there

im still here with the toolkit

let me get to work just stay there

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the door opens 

she walks out it 

alone with my thoughts

wonder why i even thought about it

should have stayed on my own path

and had no doubt about it

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but the emotions were raw

there was no clout or fame about it

i guess childhood dreaming

should remain childhood dreaming

and so i lay to rest this hatchet

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